Wednesday, July 12, 2006

My Sister is Supposed to Love Me, Not Beat Me!

I've spent Monday and Tuesday with my sister. We went on bike rides both days. The first day, we rode in my Mom's gated golf community. I wanted my sister to get comfortable in her clips and new shoes, without dogs and speeding rednecks with big wheel pick-up trucks. I didn't want her to fall and hurt herself. I was showing sisterly love.

Yesterday, we went on a ride in my neighborhood. I live in the couuuuntry! I warned her about the dogs. I told her to just stop and unclip right away if a dogs comes after us. We drive down my road and I warn her about this little Jacked-UP Russell Terror about 500 yards ahead. He comes yipping out and chasing Val's rear tire. I scream, "NOOOO! You little fuckin' BASTARD! NOOOO!"

Val was cracking up. Everyone that rides with me knows I will colorfully yell at the dogs. Most of the time it works. I try to sound like a crazed drill instructor. I was protecting my sister.

Do you know what my sister told me last night while we ate at my favorite Mexican restaurant? That she is competitive and wants to beat me, she tries to beat her husband too. She is excited to race and will probably be so nervous she won't sleep much Friday night. Then I remembered, the entire time we had been riding the last two days, she had been glued to my rear tire.

I'm starting to get concerned. This was the same sister that would hold pillows over my face and I'd have a suffocation melt down. She would hold my legs behind my head like I was pretzel girl. It would make my lungs feel collapsed and I couldn't breathe. (ahhh..sisterly love!!)

I could never physically give my sister a whomping so I would come up with mental punishment. Like the few months the Jehovah Witness would come to our house. I would answer the door and tell them my sister had been waiting for them, have a seat in the living room. Then I'd call down to her room, "Val your friends are here to see you!" She would have to spend at least 15 minutes with them if I had them seated.
She would pummel me for that shit!

Oh yeah, this is the first race my Mom will be attending too. Maybe with all this sibling rivalry, I'll make some personal records. We shall see, we shall see.

7 Comments:

At 9:01 PM, Blogger Nancy Toby said...

Put some Ex-Lax in her chocolate Gu.

 
At 9:37 PM, Blogger KBGee said...

It sounds like you have both a new training partner and someone to motivate you. Good on you!

 
At 11:37 PM, Blogger JF said...

Girl? I don't know what to tell you except that you are just as competitve. You will fight probably harder than you ever have if you see her in front of you! I know you will! Kick her ass and do well, but if she does beat you, just know that there is no reason to beat yourself up. That's no fun! Just enjoy it and don't forget, it's only your sister!

 
At 9:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

OH MY GOD!!
I thought my sister was the only one who'd was mean enough to put a pillow over my face and sit on it when we were kids!!!
She'd be on top of me, laughing at my kicking feet and I'd be suffocating under her big butt!!
Chew her up and spiit her out on saturday!
Kick her ass!
Then give her a big sisterly hug :)

 
At 8:36 AM, Blogger Chris said...

Haha! Coming from a younger sibling, I can sympathize with being the runt of the two. But mental payback is a bitch, isn't it? :)

 
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