Too Much Information

Okay, I'm just going to warn you. This post has nothing to do with training or triathlon. My husband actually brought it to my attention that most of my posts don't. I do create race reports. I don't like talking about training all the time. Because my life is more exciting than running 6 miles, working my triceps and chest and spending some time next to my Mom on the elliptical today. I enjoy the comedy in life.

I kind of felt bad I didn't talk tri stuff today, after he brought it up. I thought maybe I should have two separate blogs. One about life and one about training. My husband asked me not to write this post but it amuses me. It's my blog for Christ Sake! I write it more for me than anyone else. I want to remember this moment five years from now, even though it's embarassing. Don't read it if you don't like it. I'm brutally honest, even if it makes me look bad. So, if you have a problem with sex or farting stop reading right this moment. I don't want any too much information comments. IMO

You have been warned. I tell this story because I'm sure it's happened before. Also, when it happens to you, you won't feel so alone.

Last night, I was too lazy and depressed/drunk about selling the goats to make dinner. I settled on a bowl of bran cereal and the Dannon Activa Yogurt. The yogurt that says it helps with digestive health. I usually eat this yogurt in the morning. It was my dessert last night.

I think I'm close to ovulating, my sex drive is up. This morning, we were making love before work. My stomach woke me up making weird noises. It looked kinda puffy. I was in the mood anyway and you know how you just go limp when you 'gasm? Well, I let out a really loud, long fart. It didn't stink but it was in fuckin' stereo.

I was in shock. I hardly ever fart, for real! It is like a treat for Don to hear me fart. He's always like "Aaaaawwwwwwww!! I heard that little trumpet toot you just did!" It's a baby beep noise.

What happened this morning, wasn't a trumpet. It was a tuba. I wasn't sure what to do. I pretended in my seconds of bliss he was deaf enough not to hear it. When I saw the expression on his face I knew he heard it. How could you not? I will still shocked, I bet it shook the headboard!

I started hysterically laughing. I mean hurt my AB muscles laugh. He did too. That is why I love him. He doesn't make me feel like a nasty buzzard, he just kept going. I'm not eating that Activa or Bran cereal at night anymore!