Monday, March 26, 2007

It's Been Awhile

I finally have some time to update. I have a new lap top and thought about my blog yesterday at work. Aimee, one of my triathlon friends came into the restaurant to eat breakfast in the morning with her new fiancee. She asked if I remembered what I was doing at this time last year. She reminded me of the bike ride that Jesse, Meg, Kurt and I went on at Morrow mountain. It seemed so long ago, I was so much more innocent and naive then. My demons back then consisted of finishing in the top three of the novice division. Life can change so quickly in a matter of one year.

I am working a lot, probably 45-50 hours per week. I do have Monday/Tuesday off from both jobs which is great because it's like my own little weekend. I get my bills paid, go to the laundry mat and go shopping. Time seems to go by so quickly now. I can't believe it's almost April. I sometimes look out the window at work and admire the Bradford pear trees blooming and feel sad. I wish I had more time to be outside and enjoy nature. I did enjoy all the time I spent outside training for triathlon.

My jobs waitressing are going just great. I feel comfortable now and know how to communicate and strike up conversations with strangers. Whatever I do, I put 100% of myself into it. I think I'm a good waitress, my tips are good and I receive quite a few compliments. It seems like the compliments come just at the right time, when I need them the most. What flatters me the most is how many customers remember my name. It's nice when I walk in at 6am and hear, "Good morning, Michelle." or when I'm leaving at night at walk through the bar and hear, "Have a good night Michelle, drive home safely." There is one couple I wait on everyday Sunday morning, before church. The husband has cancer and the wife always leaves me three indian silver dollars for my tip. I have been saving them. I told her a week ago how much they meant to me. One day, when I have a child, I'll give them the silver dollars I have been saving and tell them about this time of my life. I have some great customers and I do my best to make them feel special and appreciated too.

Friday's are still my most difficult days, 17 hours of working as a waitress is physcially and emotionally taxing. Even though my ass may be dragging, I still must smile and give the best service possible. Last Friday night, at the end of my shift, I was so tired that I couldn't wrap silverware properly without really focusing. It's supposed to be two forks, one spoon and one steak knife per napkin roll but I was wrapping two spoons. Simple tasks become difficult when I'm so tired. When I finally get home, a shower seems as difficult as the 1.2 mile swim at White Lake.

I still cook when I have the time and share my culinary creations with co-workers and people that live in the apartment complex. I have some people at work that will pay me for my homemade honey mustard dressing. There is an old lady in the apartment complex, Needa, that is 88 years old. She can no longer drive so she is sort of stuck here. She'll go for walks everyday and is a happy soul. I have started bringing her food several times a week. She is so sweet, she'll watch for me to come home and bring back my Gladware. "Oh Michelle, those chicken and dumplings were so delicious. I have been looking out the window for you to come home. I have memorized your car and license plate number." She's going to turn 89 soon and I'll make her a birthday cake to celebrate.

I do have some difficult days. Yesterday was one of them. I was tired after work and I have a cold. There is a pond behind my apartment and I went down to watch the sunset. A pair of mallards were on the pond and I fed them some bread. I thought about my animals. I thought about how at this time of year, I would be incubating baby birds. I thought about my goats and how they'd normally be kidding about now. And most of all, I thought about Monty and Missy. I miss them so very much. I cried.

I have seen Monty and Missy once since I have left. I took them for a walk at the park, then to Sonic and we ate popcorn chicken, french fries and they split a hot fudge sundae. Then, I took them to the petstore and they picked out a toy. We had a great time and then Don came to pick them up before I had to be into work that afternoon. Don is very angry with me and it's difficult to see the dogs because I must see him too. He won't let me just go to the farm to pick them up while he's at work. He insists on being present when I pick them up. I sometimes wonder if it's more difficult on them to see me too. Like are they waiting for me to come back? If I don't see them, maybe they'll just forget about me and think I died. I feel torn a lot when it comes to the dogs. I feel like a bad mother that abandonned her children. My lease expires in July and I may try to find a place that allows animals. I need to think it through. I don't want to move Monty and Missy if it would be more difficult on them. I will be working and going to school. They have the 25 acres on the farm to roam and a doggy door to use to go potty at any time. They deserve the best and I don't want to make their last few years more difficult. My heart aches for them and I desparately miss them when I have some quiet moments to reflect.

I am proud of myself. I never thought I could take care of myself but I'm doing just fine on my own. It feels great!


At 11:36 AM, Blogger 21stcenturymom said...

It's so great to hear from you. I was going to send you an email to ask how you are doing.

I'm not surprised that you are doing well, standing on your own 2 feet. It sounds hard but it also sounds like you are doing great. You are such an amazing person.

I am so looking forward to reading about how your life evolves once you have started school and then start working on the other side of the counter where the kitchen puts the finished food.

I'll bet you could be a honey-mustard dressing millionaire if that's what you wanted!

At 12:22 PM, Blogger Bolder said...

thanks for checking in!

you're doin' great on your own.

i wish you happiness.

At 12:49 PM, Blogger Laurie said...

I'm glad to hear you are doing well. You are a strong woman. Life is never easy but you seem to be making things work. Keep us posted.

At 3:30 PM, Blogger E-Speed said...

Glad to hear you are doing well. Being seperated from your dogs must be tough. Hopefully you will work out a plan that makes everyone happier.

I am so glad waitressing is going well for you. I was so horrible at it, I could never do what you are doing.

At 3:43 PM, Blogger Papa Louie said...

Michelle, Good to hear from you. And that you are managing well. Sorry to hear about the distance you have from Monty and Missy. Hopefully, you can work something out with Don.

At 4:03 PM, Blogger DaisyDuc said...

I had been thinking about you and glad to hear that you are managing well.

If you think it may be best to leave your dogs at their home, perhaps a new animal at some point when you move may help. My parents took in my dog and it did not seem right to take him back. Even though I still miss him, I am so happy to have my new dog and kitty!

At 10:23 PM, Blogger Robin said...

Good to hear from you and glad to hear that despite the cold and the blues sometimes, that you feel great, and providing and caring for yourself makes you feel good. You can do it, Michelle.

At 12:23 PM, Blogger Siren said...

It was great to hear from you, I've wondered how you're doing. I wish you all the best, and I'm sure when the time is right you'll find a way to bring at least some of your beloved animals back into your life.

At 10:05 AM, Blogger Wylee said...

There is so much happiness and sadness wrapped up in your post. You are doing great on your own, I'm really proud of you!

At 12:16 AM, Blogger the Dread Pirate Rackham said...

Mojo! I've been wondering where the F you went!

Good to hear that you're doing it on your own - sounds like it feels right.

Respek - waitressing is hard work - I would be totally worn out if I had to wait tables! Keep us posted on your new adventure, I'm rooting for you!

At 12:55 PM, Blogger Kim said...

despite the moments of sadness, it sounds like you are doing really well, and i am really glad you are back on the blogging circuit.

kudus to you on giving your all at your job! i dont know how you are so patient and friendly 24/7! :)

At 6:01 AM, Blogger Julia said...

I kept checking and checking for an update. So glad to hear that you're doing well. It's normal and understandable for Don to be angry as it is for you sometimes to be sad. But I just KNOW that you're heading in the right direction - I can feel it!

At 3:19 PM, Blogger 21stCenturyMom said...

Heloooooo...... Do we get another update soon? I hope so!

At 11:54 PM, Blogger coachh said...

hang tough kiddo...will be catching up on reading. be safe.

At 7:29 PM, Blogger Dori said...

You're an inspiration, Mojo. Keep up the good work. I'll be extra nice to the next waitress I have.

At 12:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep your chin up, it's hard to work all the time and be on your own, but perseverence pays off.

panasonic massage chairs

At 2:56 AM, Blogger oakleyses said...

nike air max, kate spade outlet online, longchamp outlet online, tory burch outlet online, louis vuitton, christian louboutin, polo ralph lauren, ray ban outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet, true religion, louis vuitton outlet online, kate spade outlet, coach purses, michael kors outlet, chanel handbags, christian louboutin outlet, tiffany and co jewelry, red bottom shoes, christian louboutin shoes, ray ban sunglasses, louis vuitton outlet, tiffany jewelry, oakley sunglasses, true religion outlet, prada handbags, longchamp outlet, burberry outlet online, nike outlet, michael kors handbags, coach outlet, oakley vault, gucci handbags, nike free, longchamp handbags, coach outlet store online, prada outlet, louis vuitton handbags, burberry outlet online, coach outlet, michael kors outlet store, nike air max, michael kors outlet online, cheap oakley sunglasses, louis vuitton outlet, michael kors outlet online, michael kors outlet online, jordan shoes

At 3:02 AM, Blogger oakleyses said...

nike air max, guess pas cher, sac michael kors, louis vuitton uk, true religion jeans, michael kors canada, converse pas cher, hermes pas cher, scarpe hogan, lululemon, michael kors uk, sac vanessa bruno, air jordan, timberland, oakley pas cher, nike free, lacoste pas cher, hollister, ray ban pas cher, ralph lauren pas cher, north face pas cher, longchamp, mulberry, longchamp pas cher, abercrombie and fitch, burberry pas cher, chaussure louboutin, nike free pas cher, barbour, vans pas cher, nike roshe run, air max pas cher, air max, louis vuitton pas cher, north face, ralph lauren, nike air max, nike blazer pas cher, tn pas cher, louis vuitton, nike roshe, hollister, nike air force, true religion outlet, sac louis vuitton, ray ban uk, new balance pas cher

At 3:08 AM, Blogger oakleyses said...

north face jackets, canada goose, lululemon outlet, instyler ionic styler, ugg boots, babyliss pro, jimmy choo shoes, wedding dresses, canada goose outlet, marc jacobs outlet, uggs outlet, new balance outlet, mac cosmetics, nike trainers, chi flat iron, celine handbags, beats headphones, insanity workout, ferragamo shoes, valentino shoes, herve leger, mont blanc pens, abercrombie and fitch, birkin bag, ugg, asics shoes, ugg soldes, uggs on sale, north face outlet, reebok shoes, hollister, nike huarache, nike roshe, mcm handbags, bottega veneta, longchamp, giuseppe zanotti, replica watches, uggs outlet, p90x workout, ugg boots, soccer jerseys, ghd, nfl jerseys, canada goose outlet, vans outlet, soccer shoes, canada goose outlet, ugg outlet

At 3:13 AM, Blogger oakleyses said...

timberland shoes, replica watches, iphone 6 case, moncler outlet, converse shoes, canada goose pas cher, baseball bats, uggs canada, lancel, hollister, canada goose, louis vuitton canada, coach outlet, vans, montre femme, parajumpers outlet, canada goose uk, wedding dress, gucci, canada goose, pandora jewelry, moncler, moncler, moncler, ralph lauren, moncler, oakley, moncler, swarovski jewelry, pandora uk, swarovski uk, toms outlet, louboutin, moncler, ray ban, hollister canada, nike air max, ugg, links of london uk, converse, juicy couture outlet, thomas sabo uk, karen millen, air max, hollister clothing, supra shoes, pandora charms, juicy couture outlet

At 10:20 PM, Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

ninest123 10.29
nike free, oakley sunglasses, burberry outlet, air max, louis vuitton handbags, michael kors outlet, rolex watches, tiffany and co, ugg outlet, polo ralph lauren, oakley sunglasses, longchamp handbags, jordan shoes, ray ban sunglasses, air max, oakley sunglasses cheap, louboutin, louis vuitton, burberry outlet, kate spade outlet, prada outlet, uggs, michael kors outlet, chanel handbags, louis vuitton outlet stores, coach outlet, gucci outlet, nike shoes, michael kors outlet online sale, longchamp outlet, ray ban sunglasses, ugg boots clearance, prada handbags, louboutin shoes, longchamp handbags, louis vuitton outlet, michael kors outlet, michael kors outlet, cheap oakley sunglasses, cheap uggs, kate spade handbags, louboutin outlet, christian louboutin, michael kors outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet, ray ban sunglasses, oakley sunglasses, tiffany and co, uggs outlet

At 10:24 PM, Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

michael kors outlet, nike free, michael kors uk, true religion jeans, hollister, hogan outlet, abercrombie and fitch, north face, true religion outlet, sac longchamp pas cher, nike tn, coach outlet store online, nike air max, nike trainers, lululemon outlet online, michael kors, nike air force, north face, nike roshe run pas cher, air max, true religion outlet, ray ban pas cher, ray ban sunglasses, polo lacoste, polo ralph lauren, longchamp, coach purses, new balance pas cher, louboutin, sac burberry, mulberry, nike huaraches, sac hermes, air max pas cher, coach factory outlet, ralph lauren, vans pas cher, nike roshe, oakley pas cher, vanessa bruno, converse pas cher, hollister, sac guess, air max, hollister, nike free pas cher, air jordan, timberland, true religion jeans, michael kors pas cher, longchamp

At 10:28 PM, Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

north face jackets, nfl jerseys, p90x, soccer shoes, instyler, air max, iphone 6s cases, louboutin, mcm handbags, north face outlet, ferragamo shoes, valentino shoes, nike roshe run, chi flat iron, converse, insanity workout, vans, air max, mac cosmetics, ray ban, wedding dresses, babyliss pro, timberland boots, iphone 6s plus cases, vans shoes, asics running shoes, gucci, abercrombie and fitch, reebok outlet, lululemon outlet, beats by dre, baseball bats, abercrombie, s6 case, ghd, ipad cases, celine handbags, ralph lauren, soccer jerseys, bottega veneta, oakley, mont blanc, jimmy choo outlet, hollister clothing store, new balance shoes, iphone cases, birkin bag, herve leger, iphone 5s cases, iphone 6 plus cases, giuseppe zanotti, iphone 6 cases, nike blazer

At 10:32 PM, Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

juicy couture outlet, swarovski, swarovski crystal, ugg, hollister, barbour, moncler, moncler, canada goose, montre homme, ugg pas cher, michael kors outlet, moncler, canada goose, ugg, converse shoes, toms shoes, moncler, louis vuitton uk, ugg, canada goose, pandora jewelry, wedding dresses, doke gabbana, pandora jewelry, marc jacobs, thomas sabo, canada goose jackets, links of london, sac louis vuitton, moncler outlet, ugg boots, moncler, michael kors outlet online, sac lancel, pandora charms, louis vuitton, michael kors handbags, moncler, juicy couture, louis vuitton, coach outlet store online, canada goose uk, rolex watches, canada goose outlet, sac louis vuitton, karen millen, canada goose, barbour, canada goose, moncler, supra shoes
ninest123 10.29

At 8:13 PM, Blogger 艾丰 said...

louis vuitton
michael kors outlet store
canada goose jackets
replica handbags
louboutin uk
canada goose sale
michael kors outlet,michael kors outlet online,michael kors,kors outlet,michael kors handbags,michael kors outlet online sale,michael kors handbags clearance,michael kors purses,,michael kors bags,michael kors shoes,michaelkors,cheap michael kors
cheap oakley sunglasses
nike air max 2014
ugg boots
hollister,hollister canada,abercrombie and fitch,abercrombie,abercrombie fitch,abercrombie kids,a&f
hollister pas cher
ugg boots outlet
adidas jeremy scott
chanel outlet store online
michael kors outlet sale
moncler jackets
cheap uggs
michael kors handbags
links of london uk
the north face jackets
basketball shoes
north face jackets
michael kors outlet
ugg outlet
louis vuitton outlet store
true religion sale
giuseppe zanotti sale
barbour clothing
ferragamo shoes
air jordan shoes
nike trainers uk
canada goose outlet

At 10:52 AM, Blogger Liu Liu said...

Not Nike Free Run as surprising, however, is that by Monday afternoon, when christian louboutin Panettone spiked leather wallet the Vikings had media access NFL Rob Gronkowski Nike Jerseys with Zimmer and players once again, Nike Air Max 90 the incident was downplayed ad nauseum as cheap nfl jerseys a “miscommunication.”

Via Minneapolis Star Tribune beat reporter Matt Vensel, Rhodes NFL Tom Brady Jerseys used “miscommunication” christian louboutin men flat eight times as he spoke, nfl jerseys store and Nike Air Max 2015 Shoes downplayed the incident as something christian louboutin shoes that Christian Louboutin Women Flat was louboutin outlet straightened out after the first defensive christian louboutin uk series, not the first half. wholesale nfl jerseys


Post a Comment

<< Home