New Horizons

Everything is falling into place for me now. I have a routine and I'm becoming more comfortable and confident. For awhile, I was scared, I was learning. I am enjoying my jobs. Waitressing isn't the easy work but I have never been one to take the easy road. I am making great money. I have made some new friends and met some wonderfully helpful and supportive people. I used to be weary of strangers almost distrustful but I'm learning that people are mostly good.

Friday's are hard days for me. I work for 16 hours at both jobs. The evening job at the steak house, the other employees were very kind to me last night. They gave me the easier section, the section that required only breaking down the wait station at the end of the night. They didn't have to do that, they could have made me break down the salad bar or mop and sweep. They knew I was tired and they cared. Tonight, I will do the hard side work and buy everyone a drink at the end of the shift. Most of society is helpful, caring and loving. I'm embracing that and I feel like more love will come back to me.

Did I tell you that I'm going back to school in the fall? I'm going to become a pastry chef. My long range goal would be to work at a resort/hotel as the head pastry chef on a tropical island. First things first though, I have to go get the degree first. I will start at a community college this fall full time. I'm really excited!

No Sweat

I started waiting tables at the day job yesterday. You all were right, the codes are easy, it's the prices that I'll have to work on. I worked a double shift yesterday. I worked this morning and again tonight. Friday will be a double shift too. I think it's good that I'm keeping so busy. I do get some down time at night to think and reflect. I'm meeting new people, I'm opening up more and learning to strike up conversations with strangers. I feel like I can be more kind to people now. A smile and asking someone how their day is going means a lot to some folks. I now know how it feels to be alone.

I'm having sleeping issues. I don't know if I thought I needed eight hours of sleep but for the past week, I wake up every morning around 4am. I go to bed by 11pm. Maybe I'm excited about future and life. Sleeping isn't as important right now. I just hope I don't crash and have a Sleeping Beauty meltdown in a few days.

My apartment walls are thin. I can hear everything, even the man snoring next door. Geez! Maybe that's why I can't sleep. I like my little apartment, it suits my needs just right. I am hardly home anyway, only at night after work. I got a care package yesterday from my sister. I appreciate the small stuff a lot more right now. She sent me oatmeal, granola bars, M&M's, gum and tuna fish. She knows me well and what I like. I have learned that I can survive off of limited food choices. She also made me a CD, I love to hear new music. Like I said, the small things mean as much as if not more to me than lavish presents. Here is one of the songs that she had on the CD she sent.

I'm going to the gym now. I'm still lifting and doing cardio. I got teased at work today for bringing in my own lunch of salmon, asparagus and spinach pasta salad. I feel like it is more important than ever for me to care for my body. I'm working hard so I need to eat well and exercise. If I eat crap, I feel like crap. Can't be feeling like crap when I need to smile at customers!

“Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race” ~Calvin Coolidge